Choosing Role Models - Always Follow the Middle Path

As a young boy in my early teens, my role models were scientists, physicists, cricketers, authors, and some actors. I was inspired by their (hard) work and dedication to their field or profession or simply their charm in some cases. Luckily, it wasn't the age of Twitter, Facebook, or Instagram, so I wasn't deluged by their views or opinions (or as journalists call sound bites) on each and every topic that's out there!

I would follow them on news; as best as I could via TV and newspaper, remember this is in the era without social media i.e. the 1990s. I remember collecting newspaper clippings of some of these field leaders. I would make my dad buy some books if something was available. I made my dad buy me Stephen Hawking's book 'A Brief History of Time after I began admiring Hawking's simplicity and intelligence.

My Role-models

As I grew some of these professional leaders remained my role models. My interests became more streamlined but the impressions created by these leaders on my young mind carry to this day. I still admire all physicists because of my younger days' admiration of Stephen Hawking. I read 'Tough Times Never Last, But Tough People Do' because my dad told me it was Rahul Dravid's favorite book. And there are numerous such examples of positivity such leaders provided. 

Rahul Dravid

And there were many such other heroes that I started noting down their names in the top right-hand corner of a small Chemistry cheat book I had growing up. I just wanted to note down their names somewhere so I can read their names later. Maybe, I had a belief that somehow just reading their names will create a positive energy in my mind and make me think like a successful person.

As I grew up I started my journey into social media. And that's when other aspects of such leaders were exposed to me. And I realized that there were too many diverging opinions that didn't align with my inner voice. As I realized that when you idolize someone there is a tendency to try to tow all the lines of that role model. And in the real world, you cannot agree on each and every opinion with anyone; disagreements with others are a natural part of our lives.

As a young adult ideological tendencies begin with influences from parents and others around you. In my own case, these ideological tendencies covered a wide spectrum. So to categorize me as right or left wing will be impossible. After all, we like to adopt good things from wherever it comes from. 

How to choose role model(s)?

But, role models should be chosen very carefully and some of the things to watch out for are:

Authority in one doesn't automatically imply authority in all 

Someone may be a good sportsperson but their opinion on other things should be treated as just that i.e. their own opinion based on their internal tendencies and prejudices. For example, who can forget Virat Kohli's Diwali fiasco in the Pinterest advertisement? He is a great sportsman but trying to pass judgment on others who want to burst fireworks on Diwali is simply unacceptable and arrogant to some extent. Another example of such false authority is Richard Dawkins's opinion on Sanatana Dharma (Hinduism); as he never debated (Shastrartha - an intellectual debate) a true Hindu pundit who is a leading authority on Hindu philosophies yet he and Christopher Hitchens use strawman examples to bolster their arguments to discredit Hinduism (in their zeal to promote atheism). While Sanatana Dharma is perhaps the only spiritual path that includes Ontology (Vaisheshika) and logical methodology (Nyay) as part of its six foundational philosophies. And, Sarvadarśanasaṃgraha, a 14th-century compendium of philosophical systems, compiled by guru Madhvacharya includes materialist movements like Cārvāka Darśana.

Hypocrisy or duplicity 

Any person (including a role model) will have an outside opinion and an inside opinion. There is no shame in accepting this, as even we have this dual nature and life is a compromise of blurred lines and a "gray zone". Sometimes these do not reconcile so we should watch out for such conflict in others before blindly following the "trend". PETA India's cause of promoting veganism and the fight against animal cruelty is a praiseworthy goal. However, what makes this a hollow goal is when obvious hypocrisy is seen. For example, netizens pointed out their awards to celebrities but at the same time, such celebrities obviously had a business interest that conflicted with PETA's goal. So we shouldn't be blinded by a certain opinion just because it came from our favorite person! The ability to stay curious, thrive in doubt, and explore various schools of knowledge should be something we should strive for throughout our life.

One's background is not black and white 

Each and every one of us has a unique background that's an amalgamation of upbringing, parents, teachers, circumstances, and an inner voice that guides us. And most of the time this leads to an opinion in the gray zone where conflicting opinions co-exist with a middle path that brings out a practical consensus. However, if a "role model" is trying to draw this line without a consensus or acknowledgment of the other side, then we should stay away from this aspect of this role model. Taking a stand is important, however, the stand is blinded by zeal, rigid to the extent of condescension on others' opinions, and if eventually punitive to the other side is definitely not a stand but insanity.

My Conclusion

It's important to have role models, not role models. As no single person possesses qualities that will provide you strength and guidance for all the challenges life will throw at you. Using your own analytical strengths supported by the actions of role models will provide you a plethora of outcomes that you can then apply in your life.